Top Ten Things With Which I Struggle

1. Not choking on carrots. Am I alone in this? Or is the size and consistency of a chewed carrot exactly right for being inadvertently sucked into your lungs, then coughed back up into your nostril holes at the back of your throat? I love carrots, but I have to concentrate very hard every time I eat one, otherwise I will be blowing it out my nose for the next three weeks.

2. Not getting completely grossed out by the things kids do. The other day I was talking with a kiddo, when, as if in slow motion, he took his gum out of his mouth and stuck it behind his ear. I thought this was an urban legend, but no. It's real, and it's happening in our schools.

3. Doing work.

4. Following through when I tell my dogs they cannot jump up on the bed at 7:30 a.m. on a Saturday. Here's how that usually plays out:

Me: "Lily, no. You cannot come up. Go to your own bed."
Lily: Presses her adorable face on the edge of the bed, and beseeches me with her beautiful blue eyes.
Me: "Okay, let's cuddle." Followed shortly after by, "Ow! Stop stepping on my bones! Okay, lie down...seriously, lie down or get out of my life."

5. Ending a sentence with a preposition. When I do, it kind of feels like cussing in public.

6. That moment right after you turn off the shower and the warm relaxing part is over, but you still have all of the toweling, lotioning, hair-drying, make-upping, and dressing ahead of you. That depresses me every time.

7. The moment when I have to finally turn off my book on tape because I have made it to school, and I have been just sitting in the parking lot for 7 1/2 minutes, and anyone walking by will think I am crazy as I stare straight ahead. Of course I'm not crazy, I am listening to the ending of "It" by Stephen King, and it is intense.

8. Counting all the way to 10.

Of course, these are not "real" struggles (except for the carrots, that's real).  I wrote these down because we all suffer in some way, and I hope those who are suffering a lot, or a little, will find some comfort in a little joke here and there. A small smile, a soft chuckle, or even a lightening in the chest area. If any of those things happen as a result of reading my blog, double yay.

The Funny Thing

A funny thing happens when I write, more on that later.

I have a friend that told me once that she is not one that has a love/hate relationship with running. She says that they are definitely monogamous. I have blogged about running before, and I can safely say that we are not monogamous, but we do hang out on a fairly regular basis, and we get along well enough to continue doing so. Still, my friend got me thinking about the relationships we build with ourselves through our hobbies, interests, or even passions. Portions of the people we make ourselves into are shaped, quite simply, by the things we do, and the thoughts, beliefs, and experiences that result from those things. My mom likes to say that I wake up in a different world every day. I think this is partially true, there are so many things that I want to learn and do. I find myself scouring Google for new interests all the time--my most recent obsession? Hair. Messy up-dos to be exact. Some of the biggies that started out with a little google search? Lampwork glass of course; check out my Etsy Shop to get an idea of where that took me. Some things I pursue whole-heartedly. Other things, I do a little research, shrug my shoulders and say, "Eh." Some are small crinkles in the plain of my existence, some are medium, and some, like the glass, are pretty good-sized lumps. However, there is something bigger floating just beneath this plain, a dark shape moving slowly and making ripples here and there, but never completely breaking the surface. My waters are never quite still.

This circles me back to my first point. A funny thing happens when I write. All those other things, glass, running, messy up-dos, I love them all in a comparatively small way. They make me, in part, who I am. But are we monogamous? Nah. Writing, however, that is my Big Love. That is the behemoth that serves as a backdrop to everything else. It is so huge that it is often easy to ignore...kind of like gravity. A very wise person once asked me, 'How can you make writing a part of your reality?' Good question. I need to not only poise this question to myself regularly, but I need to also find an answer, and to accept that the answer may be different each day. Writing sets the creaky, unused parts of my mind to turning. When I write, I think more, I speak more, and I see more. That dark shape moving slowly and silently beneath me starts to poke its nose over the surface, and that is frightening. There is nothing to protect it up here. It is big, sure, but it is vulnerable. So, I not only need to ask myself how to make writing a part of my reality, I also need to figure out how to be brave enough to do so.

Books, Pie, and Michael Phelps

Is there anything better than a refreshing swim? As it turns out, yes. There are lots of things that are better. For instance, pie. Pie is better. Chocolate pie, not...cherry, or blueberry, or some other nonsense like that. But still, swimming is pretty nice. I've been watching the Olympics, and I felt inspired to get in the pool. Michael Phelps I am not, but who was I really kidding? I've been having a little difficulty getting back on the horse after the half marathon, but that's getting better. Swimming helps! Pie does not.

Speaking of getting back on the horse, I have also been getting back into Etsy, and listing some items left over from the Spearfish show. Here are some pictures of my booth.

It turned out pretty well, and we had a nice time. Now, I am so excited to have lots of listings for my Etsy shop, it's just a matter of getting everything photographed and descriptions typed up. With school starting up soon, I better get into gear. Keep watching the shop; my goal is to list at least one new thing each day from now until the Nothing rolls through.

Summer went too fast. I am just now getting into the groove of doing nothing more than reading, running, and eating each day. A series of events I sometimes puncuate with a nap. I just finished Fifty Shades of Grey. I am currently reading Jane Eyre in hopes of regaining the brain cells I lost due to the rediculousness of the former. Ugh. I am not sure if rediculousness is an actual word, but, as evidenced by Fifty, quality writing is of no consequence. So, me not try to write pretty no more 'cause it don't matter. However, I read it through to the end...*shrug*

Sum, Sum, Summertime!

Wow...Just, wow. I have been loving my summer so much that I have not written a single blog post in...I don't know. A long time. Here is a little bit of what's been happening:

Fabulous, lovely, awesome, breathtaking trip to Massachusetts and Maine.

With a little of this:

A LOT of that:

Some of this (body surfing, Yo!)

Probably waaaay too much of this:

A touch of that:





I mean seriously, we get it, Maine. You're beautiful. Now can we move on?

No? Okay.



All in all, a great trip. Awesome places, and some much needed time with loved ones.

Now we are home. Back with the dogs, and back to work (on jewelry that is--and making some pretty good progress, thank you very much). But first, there is the race.

The Lander Half Marathon, which is, gulp, tomorrow! I have been training for this for a while now, and it is finally here! I have some major butterflies, but I think I'm ready. Wish me luck! After that, the next big thing will the the show in Spearfish. And after that...I think I'm going to take a nap.



The Things We Do...

Sometimes I create victories for myself. It helps put a spring in my step, and lets me know that I am the master of something, even if it is not a grand thing.

For example, when I go to the grocery store, I race with the checker. You know the little membership cards you get? I try to wrestle mine out of my wallet, and swipe it through the machine before the checker gets a chance to say,

"Do you have your Smith's card today?"

This is not easy, because, as noted in my previous post, my life gets kind of messy, and so does my wallet. I'm working on it. Anyway, sometimes I win, sometimes the checker wins, but it is always fun. Always.

Anytime I am able to make a cursive "c" that doesn't look like a "v," I reward myself with a candy bar. A student actually pointed out that my c's look like v's. I sent him to the office.

When I make my glass beads (I make jewelry, remember?), and they don't all look like potatoes, I give myself potato chips. The down side of this is, if my beads do end up like potatoes, I have to eat a raw potato. They're not great.

If I walk around all day in my new 4 inch wedges without falling off of them and breaking my ankle, I get a doughnut. If I do fall off of them...well, I probably have a broken ankle, and that is punishment enough.

If I write a post on my jewelry blog that actually has something to do with my jewelry, I get a whole cake! Clearly, that hasn't happened in awhile. I promise the next post will be about my progress toward the Spearfish Show, with pictures of my latest projects and all. Really.

If I write a post in which I address my readers as if I actually had readers...I don't actually get anything except the realization that I am being delusional. Please follow my blog (click the "join this site" button on the right!). I would be so happy if you did, and the reward I give myself for getting more readers would be absolutely bananas!

On a serious note (in case you couldn't tell that this post is absolutely and totally silly), it is very important to celebrate our accomplishments, big and small, real and imagined. We already have plenty of ways to break ourselves down, and it can be so easy to ignore our victories. Yes, a lot of them are small (i.e. successfully avoiding the aggressively friendly stranger at the grocery store--more scary than cuddly), but they are victories nonetheless. I want to hear about yours! Leave them in the comments section!

P.S. I do not recommend that you indulge in chocolate and/or processed sugar every time you write your cursive letters correctly. Neither do I actually condone eating a doughnut every time you walk without falling down. Just to be clear. However, if your lampwork beads don't look like potatoes, by all means, have a chip.

Keeping It Together Can Be Hard

Do you ever feel like you are losing you mind? If yes, does this feeling ever last for a month or more? Well, (I say with a seasoned chuckle) this happens to me every other month and lasts for about three months. That's right, do the math...I feel like a crazy person approximately all of the time. So, assuming that I'm not alone in this (because if I am alone I don't think I can take it--so please just humor me), I decided to write some helpful hints for dealing with stressful situations. Ready? Here we go.

1. Do you have too many books cluttering your house? Well, simply gather the ones you don't want anymore, stuff them in a bag, and leave by them the front door for three weeks, telling yourself each time you trip over them that you will take them to the used book store as soon as you have a moment to breathe. If you're lucky, your dogs will help you out, like this:

Magadoo, sitting happily atop her pile of ruin.

Notice the shredded pages all around her? Yes, the darling took it upon herself to eat some of those pesky books--that's two fewer books I need to worry about schlepping to the store! Score! Look closely at her face. Here is what she is communicating with that sweet little smirk:

Maggie: "Hey, Amy. Remember that time this morning when you had to get to work early, and you didn't take me for a walk? Yeah? Ringing any bells? Well, I ate your books. That's right. Now go get the leash."

And that, my friends, is how you deal with excess clutter. Situation handled.

2. Is one of your best friends having surgery? Okay, I have the perfect solution. Forget about it! Just completely let it slip your mind, then call her the day after for a nice little chat. When she sounds groggy, and not quite herself, you can tease her for drinking at 10:00 in the morning. Then, when she says, "Oh no, it's just the pain killers for my surgery," you can sit silently for a full 30 seconds, really soaking in the guilt until it feels like it will crush your bones. Once you are saturated in your shame, beg for forgiveness, then ply her with gifts. You're welcome.

3. Do you keep getting letters from your insurance company requesting proof that you repaired a hole in the ground next to your house, but you can't really provide proof other than to say "I took dirt from another part of the yard, and put it in the hole until it was nice and filled,"? Don't even sweat it. Just put the letter on top of your bill box with all the other important documents that you don't know how to address, and ignore it. What are they gonna do? Cancel your home owners insurance? (Laughing)I don't think so...oh, wait...

4. Finally, do you feel like you have just way too many things to do in any given day? No problem! Just make a list, like this:

See how simple that is? All you have to do is follow the list, and mark off the items as you complete them! Genius!

Ahh, helpful hints are great! You know what's even more helpful? Knowing that it's okay to take the occasional trip to Crazy Town, as long as you come back. Things get so chaotic, but it helps me to remember that the world will keep right on going, and so will I. Treat your day like a rousing game of Duck Hunt on Nintendo. Know that you'll get a few, but some will fly away and then a dog will come out of the bushes and laugh at you. It's okay. Celebrate the hits, and save the misses for tomorrow. I wish everyone knew how much wisdom there is to be had in the original Duck Hunt.

Up Wake

I stepped into a Barnes and Noble a couple of weeks back. This is a big deal when you live in the boonies--doesn't happen often. Of course, I love our little used bookstore on Main Street like it was my own--but I get dazzled by the bright lights of Barnes, the stacks and stacks of spanking new books, and...oh my, an escalator! That's not one, but two floors of books! Hazahh! I went into a bit of a frenzy, and decided that I absolutley had to have some new books if I was to continue breathing. Yes, I have a Kindle--but I could never give up regular books. Just not happenin', mmkay?

All that being said, I am quite pleased, so far, with one of the books I got. It is So Much For That, by Lionel Shriver. I am not completely done with it--I'm actually about 1/3 of the way through, so this is not an actual review of the book, just my ponderings. The thing I love about the book is the characters. When you flip to the first page, it's like they are all there, hands outstretched, saying "Come on in. Walk around in my life for a bit. It's great to have you here." In return for me taking them up on the offer, they give me 100% honesty, warts and all. It also helps that one of the main characters is a metalsmith, and seriously flawed--I love that. I also get a chuckle because one the ideas that a particular character continuously complains about is capitalism--I find this funny because it was my reaction to the big, glitzy corporate store that got me to buy the book...it doesn't take much to make me laugh, I guess.

The book is big, and tasty, and delicious and I love sinking my teeth into it every night. Books bring me so much joy. I know I am not the first person to think or say these things, but why should that stop me? The things that wake us up and spark our minds should be shared, so there you go. Have a happy day!

Pie?

The guy that owns the greenhouse is quite possibly the happiest person in the world, plus he's a giant. He's like an excited Big Bird with a long pony tail. He's awesome. He's one of those people that you instantly like because he emanates pure joy. As we wandered looking at trees way, he came up to us. Here is how the conversation went:

BB: Aren't those birches awesome?! (I never combine my exclamations with my question marks, but that is the only way I could capture his enthusiasm, and I still didn't do it justice.)

Me: Yeah, we have an empty lot next to our house and we wo-

BB: ORCHARD!! (he throws up some jazz hands)

Me: Maybe, bu-

BB: Oh yeah, an orchard. Pears, apples, cherries...(whistles through his teeth with a dreamy look in his eye as he rocks back on his heels).

My Husband (Ryan): Watches quietly with his hands in his pockets, a happy little smile on his face.

Me: Or these birches...

BB: Mmmm hmmm, mmmm hmmmm. Imagine the pies.

Me: Pies...I like pies.

BB: Well, look around. These birches are native, so they'd do real well for ya'.

Me: Pies...

We kept looking, and eventually we started talking to BB again because the trees we already have tend to get a little sickly. 

BB: Oh, sounds like you have Scale. You might need some Lime Magnesium (I can't remember exactly what chemical he said, so I'm making it up).

Husband: Still quiet, nods his head.

BB: Looks at Ryan. Yeah, you know about the Lime Machomeesa.

Ryan: Nods again.

When you've been with the same person for a significant amount of time, you develop an unspoken language. It goes way beyond body language, and is derived instead from an intimate knowledge of the other person. So intimate, that all you need is a little bit of context to understand exactly what is happening in their mind. Here is what was happening between us at this moment.

Me: I glance at Ryan, and my look says, You don't know anything about Lime Mancala.

Ryan: Does not return my glance, but in so doing he says, I know that you know that I don't know the first thing about Lime Mandolin, but I don't want to interrupt. Just go with it.

So, we finish up our conversation, look at a few more trees, and leave. We totally forgot to get the Lime Of Monte Cristo. As we are driving away, Ryan says:

Ryan: Am?
Me: Yeah?
Ryan: I don't know anything about Lime Mandungus.
Me: I know, Sweety.
Ryan: Lunch?
Me: Yes. How about some pie?

The Day I Got Nothing Done

I had a hard time pulling it together today. I did not have to work, but my husband did, so I had the house to myself. Perfect time to get started on jewelry for this summer's show, no? I got up brightish and early-ish (a.k.a my dogs jumped on my head until I stumbled out of bed), brewed my coffee, ate my cereal, and...watched an episode of Smash on my DVR. Okay, once that was done I thought about putting on my shoes and getting my run out of the way. I thought about it, but what I actually did was, wait for it, watch another episode of Smash. I'm behind, okay? It's been a busy couple of weeks.

So, once I got caught up on Smash (Uma Thurman, you vixen, you), I looked at the clock and thought I had enough time to run before my hair appointment. I promise you I was headed for my shoes when the phone rang. It was my dear friend whom I have not spoken to since...Wednesday. So, I settled in for a nice long chat. She's doing well, by the way. Thank you for asking.

By the time I hung up the phone I had reached the red zone--the place where you absolutely must get in the shower within the next 45 seconds or you will be terribly late for whatever appointment awaits you. The red zone happens at different times for all women, for me it is exactly 53 minutes before whatever I have scheduled. For example, if my hair appointment was at 1:00 p.m., I absolutely must be in the shower and fairly wet by, at the latest, 12:07. 12:08 is pushing it, at 12:09 I may as well just put on some deodorant and clean socks and call it good.

After making all my appointments (I was only a teensy bit late), I just did not have the energy for that run. I did, however, make some beads. But, I was feeling just a little off-my timing just wasn't there. Here is one of the scariest things about working with glass. If you heat it too fast, it shatters and sends tiny, hot little shards right toward your face. I have never actually been hit in the face, but it is still quite terrifying. What's worse, when this happens, I jerk my head back really hard which really hurts because whenever I am working glass in the flame, I tilt my head to look at it. So, basically, I look at my glass the same way my dog looks at me when I say any of these words:

Ball.

Walk.

Or, Bone.

So, you see, jerking your head back when your neck is all twisted really hurts. But, I did end up with these little pretties.

I think they're worth a little whiplash.

Yup.

Well, here's to a more productive Saturday! 

Over The Moon

I am trying to get my head back into my real life right now. I was away for almost a week at a conference put on by the Council for Exceptional Children, and came back buzzing with new ideas and exciting directions. I was still processing this the morning after my return as I pushed against the cold wind and headed to our mailbox. Inside I found an envelope from the Spearfish Arts Center. My breath caught, and I whispered to Ryan, "I got an envelope from Spearfish."

"Whatever it says," he began, "just be okay with it."

Spearfish is the sight of the annual Festival In the Park. It is one of the largest art festivals in the upper Midwest--yes, I'm quoting their website. Anywhoo, it is a juried show, meaning you have be selected by, you guessed it, a jury. I applied to it last month and have been working very hard ever since then to put it out of my mind--quite unsuccessfully.

With my heart hitching, I tore into the letter and...I got in! This will be my very first juried show, and I am over the moon. Way over! I am scared, and anxious, and trying to figure out how I can possibly make enough before then, but I will do it. My wonderful family has already to volunteered to help in various ways--they're the best--so I certainly don't think I'll be short handed. Hmm, I may have to teach Ryan to use jeweler's pliers...we'll see how that goes.

Now, I have to go breathe because I am at a constant risk of hyperventilating when I think about the show. The good hyperventilating, that is.

Hello, Stranger

Spring Break is over, *deep sigh*. We get so busy during the school year, that sometimes it feels like Ryan and I just kind of get used to not interacting a whole lot.

So much so that the first morning of break, when I glanced over the rim of my steaming coffee cup and saw my disheveled guy across from me, I gave a shocked little, "Oh, well hello! How are you?" 

He looked at me with the same mild surprise, and answered, "Not bad. Your hair got long."

Okay, so it's not actually that bad, but it sure was nice to spend some quality time together doing things that are not at all exciting unless you are living inside our lives.

The first thing we did was shop for trees at the greenhouse--an interesting time, I'll tell more about that later. We also got new furniture because the furniture we've been using was purchased when I was 13 years old...by my parents. Oh yes, it was time.

We also did some hiking with the dogs, and on the way I had to take a few pictures.

I love it when I look out the car window and see something unexpected, like this old truck sitting in front of an equally old-looking store front.

The dogs, however, were not as amused, and really just wanted to get to the mountains already.

And, of course, I got to make some jewelry.



These guys were so fun to make! I will be listing most of them on Etsy very shortly. 

Now, back to work. *sigh*

Breathe In - Breathe Out

In the place where I grew up it always seemed that the storms came from the West. Two giant hills hulked on the horizon in front of our house, and this is where the storm clouds would boil up, all dark and bruised. I loved watching their gray forms bloom up and out, slowly covering the whole of the sky until we were completely beneath them, smelling their rain, our hair whipping in the wind. As the barometric pressure changed, the horses would come thundering up the pasture. Not because they were scared, I don't think, but because they were excited to welcome the rain. Something about the dark storm light made them seem to glow.

These earrings make me think of improbable sources of light.

Prehnite always glows, with or without light. I love the  magic of it. I also love the soft shine of the silver discs--still having so much fun with the PMC! These guys will be on Etsy tonight.

I hope you are having a happy Monday--one full of light!

Godzilla Scares Me

I have new beads waiting for me. I made them last week, they have been annealed in the kiln, and they are currently sitting atop said kiln...waiting. I work through the week, and all the little annoyances, knowing that I have shiny little lovelies at home waiting for me to turn into something fun and pretty.

 The colors make me think of Spring!

But first, I have to get through the week. Here are a few of the things that have happened so far.

On my morning drive, I have to ascend a gigantic hill that is about a half mile long. I love cruise control, but on those long hills, I feel like it expects a little too much from my little Rav4. I mean, really, there is no need to push the RPM needle so close to the red part of the half circle, no need at all.  Me, I have a softer touch than Mr. Cruise, so I let my car go a little slower up the hill. 'It's all good!' I croon as I caress the dashboard, 'You just take your time, Rav, we are in no hurry.' But then, out of nowhere, a rusted out pickup pulls into the passing lane to go around me. I don't mind if you want to pass, honestly, but not before I've reached full speed, otherwise, once we crest the hill and the lanes merge together, I will only have to pass you because I am irrationally certain that you will drive slower than me once I reach cruising altitude, except by then I will not have the luxury of a passing lane like Impatience McSpeedy did. So I am faced with a choice, do I abuse my little Rav, i.e. mashing the pedal down and screaming "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!", or do I let him pass, most likely kicking up gravel and chipping my windshield in the process? My windshield has more pockmarks than...I don't know, the moon? Sorry, I'm a little tired. Ahh, the decisions we must make, and now I have a shiny new pock mark. But, that's okay because...

I have this at home.

Next, I am a therapist, and I am currently working in a school. Before this, I worked in a community mental health agency, and I did a lot of diagnosis--not something I really do anymore. At least, not on the record. Something I don't often tell people about me is that when others get on my nerves, I am most likely diagnosing them in my mind--usually with made up disorders. For example: "You want to know when I'm going to have a baby because, and I quote "You're not getting any younger?" Really? I don't even know your last name, and you want to talk to me about my plans for reproduction? Like we're close friends, or sisters? Hmm...sounds like Psychosis with a secondary condition of Jerk Face Not Otherwise Specified. You may want to consider medication, or at least work on replacing the filter between your brain and your mouth. Okay, I need to calm down. Deep breath, picture it...

So pretty (dreamy eyes).

Another thing, I ordered Girl Scout Cookies a while back, and they were delivered the other night. This is both good and bad. Good because, face it, Girl Scout Cookies are awesome. Bad because those little devils are terrible for you, and I have zero will power. I was born without it. Also, I was born with really thin finger nails, thanks Mom. With my lack of will power, I have devised some more creative ways of dealing with junk food, mostly through the use of verbal abuse. Donuts for instance:

I walk into the lounge at work. Donut sits on the counter, staring at me with his one eye. I stare right back, not blinking.

"You don't scare me, Donut. In fact, I pity you. Just look at you, all gooey and covered in sprinkles. What? You think your special because you're rainbow colored? Well, I haven't cared about rainbows since fourth grade. Good day, Sir." I toss my hair and stride right out of there, only to turn right around because I forgot to refill my coffee cup, which is why I went in there in the first place. (FYI, sometimes one or two teachers are sitting there silently while I do this, but it's okay, they're used to me).

This works quite well with donuts, because those guys are street smart. Girl Scout Cookies, however, are the innocents of the junk food world, and I just don't feel right about giving them the verbal business. So, here is how I chose to deal with those little beasts:

 See, Godzilla is protecting them from me. Just look in his eyes:

Do you want a piece of that? I don't. Noooo thank you. So, I quietly back out of the room, easing the door shut as I go.

I think I will make it through the week. After all, what's a little irritation when there are so many good things to look forward to?

How do you get through life's little annoyances?

Perseus and IPods

I hate running. Hate it. But, oh, how I love it. Like everything else in my life, it affects my jewelry. Because, really, isn't everything we are and everything we do an amalgam of the choices we make and how we choose to live our lives? As I slump home at the end of the day, I'm not sure I could do it without running and the lovely endorphins that come from it. Sometimes, in my job, I feel like I see more darkness than I can handle. At these times, I fight extra hard to balance the dark with things like blueberry pancakes on Saturday morning, long hugs, longer runs, and of course, some awesome jewelry.

My runs usually start out with me salking (sobbing and talking at the same time) as I roll around the floor:

Me (full on salking): "I don't want to go, I don't! Don't make me!"
Ryan (looking up from his IPad): I'm not making you do anything.
Me: I'm not talking to you (a little snappish).
Ryan: Then who are you talking to?
Me: Never mind, (as I throw myself up off the floor and finish tying my shoes).

I push and click around on my IPod until it's ready to go, then I boop and beep on my watch until it is set. Finally, I have absolutely no more excuses to procrastinate and I push myself out the door.

The First Few Minutes:

Okay, this feels good. Not too windy, not to hot. The Killers are playing in my ears. Here we go.

The Middle Part:

Getting a little warmer now, push up my sleeves, use the sweat on my forehead to slick back my stupid, stupid bangs. WHY DID I CUT BANGS?! (irritation and irrational anger are starting to increase)

The Late Middle Part:

Okay, it's really hot. Long sleeve t-shirt was not the way to go. Just breathe, my side hurts, why is it hurting? I think there's a fold in my sock...stop looking for excuses to stop. Listen to your music. What is this song anyway? The Happy Elf? (The Happy Elf is a Christmas song by Harry Conick Jr...it's not even an old song, it's new, written some time in the 90's...so, just absorb that information for a bit...). Why did Ryan load my IPod with Christmas music? It's been three years, why is it so hard to delete tracks from this thing? Skip this song, and...oh good, Garth Brooks's The Dance. Nothing makes me want to run like slow, sad country music. I need a new IPod, maybe I should throw this one in the duck pond. (irritation and anger has reached its peak)

The Last Part:

Okay, another mile, and there's only one hill in the last mile. I can do this! (irrational happiness) Yesssss, Like A Prayer is playing now. This song makes my feet sprout wings, just like Perseus. Here comes the choir, just like a dream...la la la...

Okay, pushed it a little hard, now I feel like I'm dying. Madonna just gets me so excited! Whew, sweating, pounding heart, extreme irritation, lots of anxiety. If I were to talk to another mental health professional during the last mile of my run, I would totally meet the criteria for a panic disorder. Wait, I'm rounding the corner, there's my house! Lengthen my stride, I don't even notice that Celtic Christmas music is banging away, I don't even care! Past the mailboxes, neighbors dogs are barking annnnnd...I'm home. Beep, boop, beep, (fiddling with my watch), huh...45 seconds faster than yesterday.

Here, I finally notice the endorphins coursing through me, everything looks bright, my neighbor's barking dogs sound like angels, and my victory lap...I mean my cool down feels like floating. My muscles are warm and tired, and I decide that I like my bangs just fine. I love this feeling. I love knowing that with some well-timed self torture I can pretty much handle anything. Running makes me better. Lots of things make me better, and I am so happy that I have started to figure out what they are.

One of the best things about making jewelry is the ability to create something special for a special person. I mentioned earlier that my sister's birthday was coming up, and I wanted to make her something with the PMC. Well, here is what she got:

This was my first attempt at water etching--a very fun process! I stuck a moonstone in the middle, and her birthstone, aquamarines, are clustered along the bottom. Here is how it looked while it was still in process:

This was after I etched it, and before I fired it. It's drying on a coffee mug warmer. The piece above it did not fare so well in the tumbler, so I will keep it for myelf and chalk it up to experience--do not over-etch or it will crumble away!

I burnished the raised pieces to give them extra shine against that matte silver of the background. Handy tip: I ran out of headpins right before starting on this pendant, so I dug through my scrap silver and found some long pieces of wire. I hammered their ends flat, and voila! A paddle headpin! I think she likes it

Peacocking!

I've been having so much fun with my Peacock Beads that I looked up "peacocking" on ye' old Google. Did you know that ladies are more attracted to guys who stand out in bars? For instance, a male looking for some lady attention should wear loud colored shoes and a driver's hat. Also, he should carry a cane, preferably one with a high gloss to it so it looks expensive...Hmmm...moving on.

Here is how the Peacock started. I really liked the colors, and I love the crystal clear at the top. I thought and thought about what I could do with these beads, and here is what I came up with.

It's quite simple, and really quite sexy. Perfect for peacocking if you would rather not swing a cane around.

I made the bead caps from Precious Metal Clay, and I'm so happy with how they turned out.

One more picture.



I have to mention that my husband was keeping me company in the cold March wind the whole time I took these pictures, and that is what the ladies like. Okay, we like canes too.

Soul Seeds

Our taxes are done. We didn't have to do them ourselves, but I ask you, at what price? My husband used to think that our accountant was a vampire. However, after we stumbled out of her office late Friday afternoon and simply sat in our car staring out into middle distance, we started to rethink that.

In a soft voice, Ryan (my husband) said, "I feel like I'll never be happy again."
I shivered and whispered, "I'm so cold...so cold..."

We are seriously considering the possibility that she is a dementor.

 "Where is your 1099???"

She did not suck our soul seeds, so we shook it off. We went and had a bit of chocolate, and our tax lady  floated on back to Azkaban.  We have already started preparing for next year. Itemized receipts and your Patronus is all you need to survive tax season in these parts.



Bob

I think I'm liking the PMC. Still lots to learn, but  here is one of my first projects.

I love  how the silver took to the liver of sulphur. That's what I used to oxidize it. I just got the grey pearls, and I absolutely love them! They are all rough and nubbly.

This gets me excited to do more, the weekend can't get here fast enough. My lovely sister has a birthday coming up, so...Bob, if you're reading this, stop it. Bob is the nickname I have for my sister. If you're wondering, because I know how interesting this is, the name Bob came from abbreviations of a series of other names. It started out as Sheesh, which turned into Shishkabob, which, as you can imagine, was pruned down to Bob. So, here we are.

I think I'm going to keep these guys. 



Kiln Love

So, this is my kiln. I don't have a fancy name for it like Big Bertha, or Fiery Joe, or Larry. I'm not really one to name things, except for my jewelry pieces--but those are more like titles. I agonized over what type of kiln to get to anneal my beads, and I was lucky enough to find the folks at theglasshive.com. If you are looking for a kiln, give these guys a try. They build each kiln, and have a great warranty. Also, their customer service is amazing. I have used this guy to anneal beads, and most recently to fire some PMC--those pictures are coming soon. It has been a very good little kiln, and if not, I still have the warranty!

Weekend Warrior

If I am indeed a weekend warrior, I am quite possibly the wussiest weekend warrior to ever...warrior on the weekends.  I always wake up bright and early on Saturday morning...okay, scratch that, I slowly drift into consciousness as one of my two dogs pounces on my middle and licks my face like their life depends on it. Or, at least, their bladder.  Either way, I wake up with a head full of fun things I want to do with my jewelry. 

I mean, look at those colors!  All the possibility wrapped up in a few rods of gorgeous glass. Sadly, however, other things must come first. This weekend, for example, there was cleaning, cooking, shopping, boring, boring, boring, taxes--I did not do  my taxes, but I did organize all the pertinent documenation. I leave the doing to those wiser than me. At least I think our accountant is wiser than me, although my husband believes that she is a social vampire. I'm not sure about that, but she does contextualize a mean W-2, and for that, I love her. Once we got past the yuckies that must happen every weekend, I finally got down to some real business.

I'm calling them Peacock Beads. As yet, they are simply that, beads that kind of resemble a peacock.  That is where the Precious Metal Clay comes in.  I want to use the PMC to create components that will really show these guys off.  I pulled out the PMC for the very first time this weekend--I'm a total newbie at it--and I got mixed results.

These are some pieces I made before the firing stage.  Once fired, all the organic material will burn away, leaving a solid piece of silver. At this point, I looked at them, and with a sinking heart, thought to myself 'Really, Amy? Really?' At which point my sweet husband said, "Remember how your glass looked when you first started?" I do indeed. So, I will soldier on. I will post more of my PMC efforts soon.

The PMC started out odd, and it's always so hard to learn something new.  But, you know what? It's also hard to take the first steps in a four mile run, but I did that this weekend too. So, I'll keep going. One thing I've learned from running is that you can keep going even when you're out of breath, and your foot kinda hurts.

Falling In Love...And Telling Everyone About It!

I have fallen in love.  Deeply.  It started with a little hand held torch, and a piece of fine silver wire shaped into an odd little circle.  We've been dating steadily for a little over a year, jewelry-making and me, that is, and I think it's time to take our relationship to the next level. The fire, the hammers, the molten glass...they have opened me up, left me breathless, and awakened my passion to create. 

My mother, my sisters, and my sweet husband have listened with unending patience as I prattle on about a new order of glass, or the cost of the tiniest lump of precious metal clay.  They celebrated with me when I got my first  heart on Etsy. It's been an amazing year, and it's time to grow. Spring is a special time because it's when I first opened my shop, and this year I am going to give my loved ones a break, and take my prattling the internet.  Yes, it's time!

A sweet little pair or earrings.  My own beads.  My own ear wires.

My funky little glass pendant.  I love the Botswana Agate clustered on the bottom.